Andy

Goodbye to Beasty

2006-03-16T17:33:33Z

Beasty's funeral will be on 23rd March at 1pm in St Mary's Church, Hawkwell, Essex.

If you wish, flowers are welcome or donations to Macmillan nurses, Cancer Research UK or the Salvation Army via the undertakers, W. Tate of 20 North Street, Rochford, Essex.

Beasty's family.

Right Leg Failure

2006-03-10T22:27:31Z

Huh, I woke up this morning and my right leg wasn't working. Just flat out refused to support me. Plus the whole of my right side was feeling debilitated. I was at home and it was unnerving to say the least. So I phoned my folks and they came and got me. Then we phoned the hospital and they said probably inflammation in the brain due to radiotherapy. So they upped my steroid dosage till Monday when I see the consultant. But it's a pain being barely able to walk.

Ah, dang it, shave it all off!

2006-03-02T21:09:57Z

Well, I lost so much hair it looked pretty silly. I hadn't realised how silly until my mum pointed out the huge bald patch on the back of my head. So a good mate came over with his clippers and shaved it down as close as he could, then razored me bald. Feels weird, but hey, saves on shampoo!

Photos will be forthcoming, with any luck.

Woohoo

2006-03-01T15:55:16Z

My work offered me a get-well present, but also said that they didn't want to get me something I wouldn't use, so what would I like?

Well, I asked for an MP3 player, of any sort and they sent me a 30Gb iPod. I now have to go and get a card to send to them with my profuse thanks.

I expected something like a small 512Mb player, not an iPod!

Proper victim now.

2006-02-27T11:57:04Z

Heh, I actually started to feel like a proper cancer victim today. My hair's started falling out. I have instant temples.

The weather, for a change.

2006-02-23T10:41:54Z

It's snowing outside. It's nearly March, but it's still snowing here and laying too. Only a light frosting and not what you'd call depth at all, but it looks like we're suffering a cold snap.

So that's it, then.

2006-02-21T18:16:11Z

I would appear to be screwed. My Dad forced a talk with the oncologist today, who said that they're not really sure what the bloody hell this cancer is, but that it's most likely lung. Basically, whatever it is, it's behaving contrary to the way most cancers do and being a total git. All the treatment I've got so far has been palliative and they're not going to rescan, cos they're most likely not going for more radiotherapy. I have an appointment in 3 weeks, but we're pushing to see them earlier. I'm gonna push for chemo, cos I think that gives me the best chance of survival. If I don't these tumours are just going to keep on and I'll be dead before my time. This thing is not going to beat me if I can help it.

I must concede on one small thing.

2006-02-19T14:13:55Z

One part of my life is now officially over and thus I must concede defeat to Monkeyman in the blood donor race.

I informed the blood service of my condition and the fact that I am on daily medication and asked to be suspended from being asked to donate. I said I would be willing to start again as soon as I was able, but they informed me that now I've had actual cancer treatment I can't give blood again.

I think I did my bit, though, by giving 34 units while I still could. Being a rare blood group too, I'll be missed. I was hoping to get to at least a hundred in my useful lifetime, but, alas, it is not to be.

Annoying, but life goes on. I, for one, intend to make sure it does.

That's that done with.

2006-02-17T13:21:17Z

Well, I just had my last of the radiotherapy sessions and I still feel pretty good, so hopefully I won't suddenly zonk out in the next day or two. The sessions themselves were very quick. You lay on the platform, they mark up your head in place, then strap you in to hold you still. Two bursts of 45 seconds each and you're done. (Medium rare is my preference!)

Whole process took less than ten minutes each time.

I now have to wait till Thursday for a follow-up and I reckon a bout of chemotherapy is to follow. I have an appointment for that in about a month. They say I should recover from radiotherapy before I start the chemo and that's the month, but I reckon on starting earlier if I still feel fine.

Reckon I need another MRI scan too, to see how the brain tumour has been affected.

Getting Zapped

2006-02-13T16:40:28Z

Well, I've just had my very first actual session of radiotherapy and I feel OK. I might not be so by the time I've had the fifth session on Friday. But it does feel good to be getting some actual proper treatment instead of reasons why other things can't be done.

Finally, things are happening.

2006-02-10T00:25:37Z

I spent today getting "calibrated" for a five-day course of radiotherapy that will start on Monday. I had to lie still on the special table while they marked up the sides of my head ready to start 1:30 pm Monday.

I expect to be feeling pretty dicey by Friday, so this may be the only entry until then. I will have to keep remembering to take the pills. I have anti-diuretics and steroids already to numb the effects of the brain tumour on my pituitary. They gave me a bottle of morphine sulphate and some cough mixture to take away today, too. I hope the pain won't be that bad, but it's a possibility.

You WHAT?!?

2006-02-06T22:27:25Z

Well, it's all gone Pete Tong, or at least it's not going like it was supposed to only a day ago. I was admitted to the hospital bright and early this morning, spent the day there, only for them to turn around and say, "Sorry, we've had a discussion and now we think it's something else and the surgery would be pointless." Seems the Marsden have changed their minds, because last week, they were saying, "Yeah, go ahead." So, now discharged and back at the folks' place. They seem to think it's not the thyroid at all, but lung cancer, of all things. Personally, I reckon it's somewhere else they haven't found yet, but the only certainty now is that I have this tumour in my brain that needs zapping, so I go in for a day radiotherapy session on Thursday, but that's as an outpatient. Apparently, there was a negative result for thyroglobulin, too, so that means I won't be radio-iodine treated, so no week of isolation. Most likely that ordinary radiotherapy and a bout of chemo is on the cards.

Can we just say, MAKE YOUR BLOODY MINDS UP, PEOPLE!!!!!

It's all on.

2006-02-02T14:08:29Z

Well, the Marsden Hospital confirmed Southend's diagnosis, so I am all set to be admitted to Southend on Monday. Actual op is set for Tuesday. I expect I'll be in for about a week. A little while after that I get the radioiodine treatment. This is quite involved. I have to stay in an isolation room and have minimal contact with other people while I'm receiving this stuff. Stay at the hospital, no visitors and restricted contact with the staff. Because the radioactive iodine gets sweated and urinated out, I will have to shower twice a day and be careful when I pee. I will, however, get to stay in a nicely appointed room and with any luck, wireless 'net access. My laptop has wireless built in, so to be able to surf will do a lot to relieve the tedium. It's a six-day treatment, so I'll need a lot of reading material to keep the boredom at bay.

"So, is that what's causing the pain when I cough?"

2006-01-27T23:48:47Z

Well, I get to be a bigger enigma to the medical profession every day, it seems. I just spent the last two days in hospital, being scanned again. I seem to have developed some symptoms diabetic in nature. They reckoned I pass 5 litres of water a day, no surprise to me, being up about eight times in the night for the last month or so. Of course, I have to drink an equivalent amount of water to make it up. Another interesting note - I have lost 13Kg since last June. Haven't had to do a thing to achieve it either. Good weight loss program, that. Got signed off from work on Monday, cos driving 90 miles a day each way with a dicky leg was doing me in.

Oh yes, I have developed a tumour in my brain, too. Said occurrence being unique in the experience among the entire oncological staff at my local hospital. So next week I go to the Royal Marsden Hospital in Chelsea for more scans, in case the thyroid is just the start, or indeed just a red herring for something else. Surgery on 6th Feb is now provisional, depending on what the primary cancer care centre in the UK find.

Surgery

2006-01-15T20:47:00Z

A little while after I posted the previous entry I heard that the surgery is to go ahead on 6th Feb. The day after Elly turns ** years old. Glad to finally have a date to look forward to (sort of thing...) Bit earlier than I had anticpated, too. I will be admitted to the hospital the day before, bit of a naff way to spend a Sunday, but there you go.

Many thanks for the positive comments I received. I continue to take heart from all of them.

(Elly, if I forget to send you a birthday greeting for a week or two, this'll be why!)

Cut-throat!

2006-01-11T23:28:29Z

Well, I finally had confirmation that it's my thyroid gland today. It's going to have to be removed, which will take place sometime in February. They're going to remove the tumours on both sides of my neck in the same operation, so I'll be under for about 8 hours or so. After which I'll have scars that'll make me look like a Sweeney Todd victim! To mop up the other tumours, I'll be put on a course of radioactive iodine. This is not a guaranteed cure and I'll be having checkups and thyroid hormone therapy for the rest of my life. I'm just glad it's the type of cancer that is curable. Apparently, there are thyroid cancers that are incurable by current methods, so in that respect I consider myself lucky.

All I have to do now is wait for a date for the op. Still, feels good to know things are happening.

From a standing start...

2005-12-20T14:24:01Z

From a state of knowing nothing for two weeks, it's all coming thick and fast.

The consultant now wants to see me tomorrow, with a view to starting radiotherapy instead of chemo. I *still* don't know what I have, but that will be all be explained to me tomorrow. Folks have had long chats with the consultant and sounds like I am due a long session of "why" and "what" etc.

I may be really zonked out over Christmas, so I have no clue when the next update will be.

Chemo it is, then.

2005-12-19T23:33:48Z

Well, my folks talked to the consultant today. They've been organising things while I have to work. (They are the most amazing people, I feel very lucky to have been blessed with the parents I have.)

The consultant wants to see me this Friday, very probably to start chemotherapy. While I don't yet know what type of cancer I have nor how severe it is, it feels good to be starting treatment. Two days before Christmas, too. Wonder how I'll feel?

Still waiting

2005-12-17T00:48:30Z

Why do consultants always seem to be on holiday when you're waiting to see them? I have yet to find out what exactly is wrong with me and what sort of treatment I can expect to receive.

At least I may have the option to speed things up by going private for the initial consultations, thanks to the scheme my Dad is a member of. Plus, the Ex seems to be incredibly sweet on me at the moment and since she works at the hospital, has tried to fast-track things for me.

The kicker is that I have not yet told Work about this whole problem because I want to give them the whole story at once. So I keep being sent to places where I do a lot of heavy lifting and walking. I really need to tell them I just can't do that sort of stuff any more. Not until the arthritis and the cough are taken care of, at least.

To everyone.

2005-12-10T19:18:23Z

I don't yet know anything more than I did in my previous entry.

This is just a quick note to say a big thank you to all of you who responded. I've read them all quite a few times and draw strength from each and every one of them.

You folks will know the details as soon as I do.

Thanks again.

It's all going off now...

2005-12-08T01:55:46Z

Well, I had the result today of the biopsy on the lump they took out of my neck.

It's cancerous. I have a few more lumps so it's safe to say I have cancer. Where it came from they don't know.

This entry will probably be superseded/replaced in the fullness of time, once I know exactly what's going on.

Illness

2005-12-02T23:01:31Z

Well, I had a general anaesthetic on Tuesday at my local hospital, during which they took out a lymph gland. Happily enough, it was the one with the biggest lump on it. If they can't analyse that to find out what's wrong with me, I've a few more. It was only a day stay, but I got the full treatment. The weirdest part was being wheeled up to the operating theatres and my trolley going past the reception area. Lots of people walking about and desks with people sitting at them and there's me on a trolley with just a surgical gown and a blanket.

Well, having got back to my folk's place I spent until today recovering. Well, not quite recovering. They had given me painkillers, but I didn't need them. The main reason was that I was under a 48 hour driving ban, so I couldn't go anywhere. This came in useful when I found work had booked me in for a two-day job in York. 250 miles away and no hotel. I soon called in sick for that one.

Thursday I was all set to go home, but events transpired against me. I hadn't been allowed to shower for 48 hours either, to keep the stitches dry, so having just finished in the shower, I managed to pass out. Somehow missing the wall and bidet when I hit the floor. Probably thanks to me sitting down when I felt faint. Spent most of the day in bed after that.

I have to go back next Wednesday to have this elaborate stitch-like thing taken out. They sort of glued a piece of tape over the incision and there's a piece of wire running the length of it with a small plastic stopper at each end. Full chest CT scan is booked for Friday, so with any luck I may get a diagnosis by week after next.

Being ill. Again.

2005-11-25T23:12:56Z

Well, I went to various doctor and hospital appointments this week. Yesterday, the consultant at the Chest clinic said in an almost throwaway comment, that I have arthritis. So that explains why I can hardly walk when I get up in the morning. Next Tuesday I will have one of the lumps in my neck taken out and analysed to see what's causing them. My cough continues more or less unabated. The chest x-ray didn't show anything so the doctor has ordered a full chest CAT scan. Don't know when that will be. The one bright spot is that the clot in my leg has dissolved so I can come off the warfarin. If I'm still around 20 years from now, 2005 is not going to be remembered by me with any sort of fondness.

Birthdays

2005-11-24T23:27:54Z

Just a quick note to say Happy Birthday to my nephew, Thomas. One whole year old today! famousamy is another year older, too, as is ticiathethief's husband Don. I won't embarrass them by saying how old they are. (Mainly because, actually, I don't have a clue how old they are!)

This 'n' that...

2005-11-23T00:03:11Z

My word, what a busy time it's been for me recently. I'm actually off this week on annual leave, but the weekend just gone was totally taken with RPGs. Three systems: Call of Cthulhu, Tunnels and Trolls and Basic D&D. Three systems, three dead characters. We actually survived CoC, but had two goes at the basic D&D dungeon and died both times. Curse the 1st Level Cleric who has NO spells. Madness!

On Monday my brand new Astra turned up. I don't like it as much as the Vectra. Things like cruise control are not included and there's less cubby holes. However, on the plus side, for a 1.7 turbodiesel it goes a hell of a lot faster than the 1.8 Petrol Vectra ever did.

This morning my new Laptop FINALLY arrived too. Plus spangly HP printer (which I didn't order), minus Office 2k3 (which I did.) So lots of phone calls to people tomorrow to sort that out. The lappy itself is TDB, wireless and bluetooth enabled, 100GB drive with a radeon X600 graphics chip. I can surf from wherever I want to now, plus it'll play the games I want it to.

Visits to various medical establishments to come later this week. I want to know why I have lumps growing in my neck, my joints are stiff as all hell and why this cough does not want to go away.

Other than that, all quiet on the Beasty front, as they say.